Y'all I Got A Struggle. I've only just realized it.
I was staying up having planned to read, but ended up socializing , then I saw the time. It was 2 am, but I decided to ignore it. I have a habit of thinking of sleep as a challenge I want to beat. Suddenly, I realized, I had been so focused talking with u guys, my neck had started to cramp from staring down at my computer screen.
So, I went to da couch and turned on the hot pad and rested my neck on it. Well, the warmth was so comfy, and my neck muscles were starting to relax and feel better, and all the sudden, I’m waking up to my mom calling me, trying to say ‘hi’ before she had to turn her phone off, for work. Then this terrible migraine hits me. (This happens everyday, even on the days I get like, sixteen hours of sleep) \
And then I realize I slept and I’m like #@!?*%^#!!!!! Because I failed the challenge. So now, my brain is telling me that even though I have been self-imposing torturous sleep schedules, It’s telling me that even though It’s sleepy, I should try to fight sleep for the 10th day in a row. (Only succeeded in 2 days in a row, max tho)
I need sleep, but right now, I’m getting 1-3 hours of sleep. And yet my brain, (It acts like separate part of me, so I gave it a name and named it Sera) instead of telling me to get more sleep, says to keep doing this for no reason. AGGGGHHH THE PAIN I GET EVERY! SINGLE! DAY!
But the funniest thing to me is that I only just realized today that my sleep is a problem
(I also have Insomnia. Ever since I was four, I took a 100 milligram trazadone. If u don’t know what it can do, it can make people faint/pass out shortly after taking it, but it took it an hour for it to make me feel even a little sleepy)
MY PAIN!