The First Prince, Adrian (2)
“W-What kind of outrageous thing are you saying!”
Edwin cried out in shock, blurting out whatever came to mind.
“Dying? You must become emperor and live a long, healthy life, Brother……”
“Do you also think I should become emperor?”
Adrian had already closed his book and rested one arm on the table.
“If I become emperor, you might die, you know?”
Resting his chin on his hand, he stared straight at Edwin.
“You know it too, don’t you? A prince who fails to claim the throne will eventually die.”
The emperor’s siblings could inherit titles from their maternal families.
Yet even those who showed no interest in state affairs and lived quietly like mice rarely lived long, most dying young.
“The emperor’s siblings are a threat by their very existence, so his retainers would never leave them alone.”
Therefore, unless one entered the Holy Kingdom to become a priest, the chances of survival for a prince who did not become emperor were extremely slim.
“That’s why you were planning to go to the Leon Holy Kingdom right after your coming-of-age ceremony, weren’t you, Edwin?”
Adrian’s words struck true, and Edwin pressed his lips tightly together.
Just as he said, the only way for a prince who failed to become emperor to survive was to flee to the Holy Kingdom and become a priest.
“And……”
Adrian paused briefly before offering a self-deprecating smile.
“No one would be happy to see a prince who might die at any moment take the throne.”
Why does this brother keep talking about dying? It’s frightening.
Edwin looked at Adrian with a bewildered expression.
“W-Why do you keep saying such things?”
“Because it’s the truth.”
Adrian continued in a detached tone, as if speaking of someone else.
“Everyone in the Imperial Palace knows I’m not long for this world.”
“But……”
Adrian glanced at his half-brother, who could not continue, then turned his gaze back to the book.
“Have you heard that story?”
“Pardon? What story?”
“Father was the weakest among his siblings. That’s why he was never even considered a candidate for the throne.”
Father had been frail?
It was hard to imagine, given the current emperor’s imposing presence.
“Even so, he eventually seized the throne, surpassing all his siblings.”
Though he used the most refined expression possible—“surpassing”—the reality had been a one-sided massacre.
The tale of the emperor killing all his siblings to ascend the throne was a famous anecdote.
“I inherited his constitution, though not his temperament.”
The sharp light in his gray eyes gradually faded.
Adrian murmured in a small voice.
“Even so, the adults want me to take the throne. They believe it’s the right thing, regardless of my own wishes.”
He wore a strangely twisted smile.
“I truly can’t understand it. What good would it do for a sickly prince with no will of his own to become emperor? He’d only be a puppet.”
Every word from his half-brother was bewildering.
Edwin felt like he might cry.
“Edwin.”
At that moment, Adrian gazed steadily at Edwin, who looked as though he were sitting on pins and needles.
“Do you have a dream?”
“A dream?”
“Yes, a dream. Or a goal, if you prefer. I only call it a dream because the chances of achieving it seem so slim.”
A dream, or a goal.
Edwin fell into deep thought.
There was only one dream a young prince could have.
I want to become strong enough to protect the people I love. And……
If possible, he wanted to become crown prince.
It was a deeply personal wish he could never voice in front of his half-brother.
Fixing his gaze on Adrian’s red hair, Edwin asked in return.
“Then what is your dream, Brother Adrian?”
“What?”
“From what you’ve said, it seems you don’t wish to become emperor.”
Yet as he himself had admitted, a prince who failed to become emperor would only die.
Surely he didn’t want to die, but he certainly didn’t want to enter the Holy Kingdom and become a priest either.
Edwin asked cautiously.
“You have another dream, don’t you?”
“……”
Adrian did not answer.
He simply stared at Edwin for a moment before lowering the hand supporting his chin.
A look of resignation far beyond his years clouded the first prince’s face.
“How amusing that the only person curious about my dream is you.”
“Pardon?”
“If you ask, there’s no reason I can’t answer.”
Adrian ran his hand over the tower of books stacked beside him.
“My dream is to become an archaeologist.”
It was an incredibly modest dream for someone born to the highest rank in the empire.
Edwin’s eyes widened slightly.
“An archaeologist?”
“Yes.”
“Why an archaeologist?”
Edwin knew Adrian liked ancient civilizations, but to this extent?
Edwin wore a faintly unconvinced expression.
I’ve heard being an archaeologist isn’t a very promising profession. Teacher said it’s no different from being a grave robber.
Meanwhile, Adrian looked down at the book before him and replied.
“Because it resembles me.”
Fragments of the past that existed only in texts and ruins.
Traces of glory remembered only by reputation.
When he looked at ancient civilizations and ruins, it felt as though he were looking at himself.
Stuck in place, forced to remain there regardless of his own will.
“And because I want to become like them.”
It was a cryptic statement.
Edwin forced an awkward smile while hiding his cold sweat.
“I-I see.”
“You have the face of someone who doesn’t understand. Is it really that surprising? That I want to become a scholar?”
“Ah, well……”
Edwin hesitated for a moment, then glanced at Adrian before continuing.
“Honestly, I don’t really understand. You could become anything you wanted, so why……”
“I could become anything. Do you truly think so?”
“Of course! Since you could even become emperor, you could become anything else……”
“Being able to become emperor doesn’t mean you can become anything. It means you can only become emperor.”
Simply because he was born the legitimate eldest son of the current emperor, the only future permitted to Adrian was to become emperor.
Some might call it a complaint born of privilege, but to him, it was nothing more than a suffocating reality.
“If you don’t become emperor, you’re nothing but worthless trash.”
Perhaps that was why he was drawn to ancient civilizations.
He envied how ruins, useless in daily life, were truly treasured by some. What must it feel like to be loved simply for existing?
“But if you become emperor, there are so many things you can do.”
“Yes, you could enjoy the greatest power and wealth. But it would only take you further from what I want. As emperor, I would exist not for myself, but solely for this empire.”
Edwin frowned in discomfort.
I didn’t know because we never had a proper conversation before, but Brother Adrian……
It seemed his half-brother enjoyed difficult conversations.
“Well, this might still be too complicated for you. You’ve probably never thought about such things before.”
Adrian changed the subject, as if he had read his half-brother’s mind.
“So what about you?”
“Pardon?”
“You still haven’t answered. About what your dream is.”
“Ah, I……”
When asked about his own dream, Edwin answered with a confident expression.
“I want to become a strong person!”
“…A strong person?”
“Yes! I want to become someone who can protect everyone I love.”
At the third prince’s answer, Adrian’s eyes wavered slightly.
“You.”
He stared at his half-brother and continued.
“You really have changed a lot.”
“H-Have I?”
“Yes. You used to hide behind the old nanny every day, only watching for reactions.”
The old nanny he mentioned was Emma, not Rachel.
Edwin looked at Adrian with surprise.
He knows about Emma. I thought he had no interest in anyone else.
Come to think of it, on the day of Emma’s funeral, a bouquet had arrived from the empress’s palace to honor the deceased. And the one who delivered that bouquet had been none other than the first prince, Adrian.
I was too distracted to notice at the time……
He remembered seeing the first prince’s figure faintly outside the window that morning, when he couldn’t bring himself to leave his room. It had been the head maid at the time who received the bouquet in his stead.
Perhaps Brother Adrian……
Edwin quietly watched Adrian as he pulled out another book.
Perhaps the first prince Adrian was a much kinder person than others believed.
“Um, Brother.”
Adrian lifted his gaze at his half-brother’s words.
“There’s one more thing.”
“What do you mean?”
“My dream.”
Bringing up another dream without being asked.
Adrian recalled how Edwin used to avoid his eyes and replied.
“What is it?”
“Well, I…… ma……”
“Ma?”
“Ma, ma……”
It was strange.
Edwin’s pale face was gradually turning red.
Just as Adrian was beginning to feel frustrated by his inability to continue, Edwin burst out.
“I want to marry the person I love!”
Adrian’s eyes widened like saucers at his half-brother’s bold declaration.