The Weight of Guilt
The rain had been falling for days.
Kallen’s sword halted mid-swing.
“What?”
His entire body froze in the middle of training.
“What did you just say, Alik?”
“The Duchess of Valentino has requested an audience with you, my lord.”
Had Canna ever come looking for him first?
She had always been the one to drive him away, reject him, kick him out. So why was she suddenly seeking him now?
Why now, of all times?
He had only just managed to steady his heart.
Kallen pressed his lips into a thin line. Lately he had endured every kind of mockery and refusal he had never experienced in his entire life.
All of it had come from Canna.
What had her most recent rejection been?
The moment those violent words struck him, the emptiness that filled him on the way back to his room had chilled him to his very toes.
Even now, he still couldn’t clearly tell whether the emotion that had lashed him then had been humiliation, rage, or utter misery.
She must have grown close to Sylvien Valentino.
He had ears, after all.
The story of how Sylvien had shot an arrow at the Crown Prince to save Canna, and how he had accepted the Emperor’s compromise to lessen her crimes, had already spread so widely that there was no one who didn’t know.
After chasing after her like a dog with its tail wagging, it seemed he had finally won her heart.
Good. That’s for the best.
The feelings he had harbored for Canna had been half pity and half guilt. That was what he had believed.
Therefore, he no longer wished to be swayed by such trivial emotions.
“What shall I tell the Duchess?”
At the butler’s question, Kallen shook his head.
“Tell her not to wait.”
“Understood, my lord.”
After the butler left, Kallen swung his sword once more.
Yes. It was such a simple thing. Why had he hesitated all this time?
From now on, I will not look at my sister. I will not involve myself in anything concerning her.
He should have done this long ago. Long, long ago.
When the butler delivered Kallen’s message, Canna simply nodded. She thought perhaps he truly was busy.
But when the same answer repeated for three straight days, even she could no longer pretend not to understand.
Kallen was deliberately avoiding her.
“No. I will wait.”
Today, when the reply “Please do not wait” came again, Canna simply sat down on the sofa.
“I will continue waiting here. Tell Kallen exactly that.”
“Yes, my lady.”
She flipped through the book she had prepared in advance and waited. Three hours passed like that, and raindrops began to tap against the window.
Kallen returned five minutes later.
“……”
The moment he opened the door and stepped inside, he stopped in his tracks.
Had he been caught in the rain during training? His body was lightly soaked.
“What are you doing here?”
“I was waiting for you.”
“I believe I sent word that you should not. It seems the butler failed to do his job properly.”
“No. I told him I would wait.”
“That is precisely why I am saying this.”
Kallen strode forward and filled an empty glass on the table with whiskey.
Oh. He must have trained hard.
Canna stared at his back. Beneath the rain-soaked shirt, perfectly sculpted muscles were clearly visible.
Well, an Addis is still an Addis.
She had only ever seen him handling documents, so she hadn’t realized he was just as diligent in his training—a model student in every sense.
“In the future, if you have something to say, please relay it through the butler.”
Kallen downed the whiskey in one gulp and turned around.
“I have nothing to discuss with you.”
“……”
“Therefore, please stop coming to see me.”
He raised the hand holding the glass and pointed at the door. It was an order to leave.
“Get out, Canna Valentino.”
What should I do about this?
Canna sat by the window of her laboratory, gazing outside. The rain poured down aggressively, as if it meant to shatter the earth.
How should I handle Kallen?
That was the only thought in her mind.
She pondered deeply over how to move this useful chess piece most efficiently.
There were no other sentiments.
When Kallen looked at her with that cold gaze, when he sharply told her not to come find him, when he drove her out of the room—Canna was not the least bit surprised.
Of course she felt no pain.
Yes. This is exactly how Kallen Addis should be.
On the contrary, it felt familiar.
It was simply that the strange Kallen of late had returned to the original younger brother she had always known.
What is clear is that, perhaps because he has grown older, he feels guilt toward me.
That was why, not long ago, he had uncharacteristically lowered his head and asked for reconciliation.
Though that guilt would have vanished quickly anyway.
As expected, it was only that much. It’s a good thing I didn’t take it seriously.
But the current Canna needed that attitude from him. And yet, of all times, that guilt had disappeared.
Then I simply need to make it appear again.
The answer was already there.
Canna rose from her chair. She scanned the row of medicine bottles, then picked one up.
This drug should be suitable.
Kallen Addis. Right now, I need your guilt.
For that, a small sacrifice would be necessary. A very slight sacrifice.
Had the rainy season begun? The rain continued to pour without end for several days.
Kallen swung his sword in the indoor training hall. Perhaps because his mind was complicated, the tip of his blade was duller than usual.
A short while ago, the butler had come to him and said:
“Today as well, the Duchess of Valentino has come to see you.”
Kallen was taken aback.
Even after being turned away at the door yesterday, she had come again. He had not expected that.
But his resolve did not waver.
“Send her away from the room. Make sure we do not run into each other when I return.”
Not only that, Kallen deliberately extended his training time. All to avoid meeting Canna.
He found his own decision ridiculous.
Changing his fixed schedule just to avoid her, just so he wouldn’t have to see her—what exactly was he afraid of?
Is that it? Am I afraid?
Kallen stabbed his sword into the floor.
Was losing his composure in front of his sister—no, in front of Canna Valentino—so terrifying?
I really must keep my distance from her.
What power did she hold that she could shake him so easily? A mere childhood guilt was no excuse.
Should I just drive her out of the Addis mansion?
Yes. That would be better.
Then he could return to his solid daily routine as before.
Kallen wiped his sweat with a towel and stared out the window. By now, night had completely fallen.
At this point, Canna must have given up waiting and left.
Thinking that, he opened the door. Cold air rushed in. The sound of rain hammered loudly against his ears.
Kallen opened his umbrella and walked forward.
“……”
But after only a few steps, he stopped again. In the pouring rain, someone was standing there.
The moment he recognized who it was, the back of his neck tightened. That was how shocked he was.
“Kallen.”
It was Canna.
“Are you finished now?”
With a feeble motion, she swept back her drenched hair.
“I kept waiting.”
Kallen’s breathing stopped.
He realized it belatedly and exhaled roughly.
He barely managed to move his stiff, frozen lips.
“What are you…”
Kallen’s trembling gaze traveled down her hair. A few strands clung to her pure-white cheek, her lips had turned pale, her clothes were soaked through…
For some reason, Kallen stared at her in a daze, feeling strangely devastated.
Had coming up with his lines, thinking of what to say, ever been this difficult?
“What exactly are you doing?”
Canna smiled weakly.
When she blinked, raindrops clinging to her long lashes fell. They slid along the curve of her cheek and slipped between her lips.
“I told you. I was waiting for you.”