Chapter 16
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Chapter 16 The distance between us had closed to an arm's reach. My veins felt as though they might burst. He grasped her frozen wrist.
"Hah."
The movement was neither rough nor violent. If anything, it was slow and deliberate. Yet the shock was so profound that a strange sound escaped her—she barely stifled a cry, nearly striking back in reflex. Yurien de Harden Kirie cradled her hand, examining it closely. It was her right hand. Beneath the silk gloves she wore lay the mark of the Demonic Sword. The color drained from Echinacea's face. Fortunately, he made no move to remove the gloves—such rudeness was beneath his character. That he had seized her hand at all was extraordinarily uncharacteristic of him. Yurien de Harden Kirie traced her hand with his eyes, then brushed his thumb lightly across her palm. There was no callus to be felt—her hand was small and delicate. By contrast, despite his refined appearance, Yurien de Harden Kirie's hand was large and rough. A Knight Instructor's hand. Echinacea shuddered slightly. Even through the gloves, the contact sent a chill through her—not merely because of the Demonic Sword's mark hidden beneath. He gazed at her hand for a long moment. His silver eyelashes, cast downward, were remarkably long. He whispered.
"Your hand is not one that delights in the blade."
Echinacea could bear it no longer. She twisted her wrist free from his grasp. Yurien de Harden Kirie did not resist. His blue eyes remained fixed upon her.
"I ask again. Why do you wish to become a Knight Instructor?"
She fell silent. Why did she wish to become a Knight Instructor? What could she possibly say? During the journey to Agenka, she had prepared for many scenarios, yet this one had never crossed her mind. If he remembered, he would hate her. If he didn't remember, he would show no interest. And if his memory was truly gone, there would be no entanglement at all. That was all she had believed. She had never imagined that Yurien de Harden Kirie would remember her from his Founding Day celebration and ask her this very question. Echinacea looked up at him with eyes clouded by confusion. Yurien de Harden Kirie waited for her answer, his gaze steady upon her. Those quiet, observant eyes felt familiar. Her turbulent heart settled like the calm in those eyes. A memory surfaced—his eyes beyond the iron gate, waiting for her victory in that erased past. She did not wish to build lies upon lies before him. Slowly, she opened her mouth.
"Because I want to be happy."
"...."
"It may sound strange, but... I mean it sincerely."
She had expected him to ask why becoming a Knight Instructor connected to happiness, what circumstances lay behind it. Yet Yurien de Harden Kirie did not ask. He simply held her gaze and replied.
"I see. That makes sense."
She feared asking whether he truly accepted this answer. The very topic weighed heavily upon her. Echinacea sought to change the subject.
"What brings you here?"
"And what brings you to this place on your first day of enrollment?"
To confirm the Fountain. To see with her own eyes whether the fact that she had killed him had been completely erased. She could never say such a thing. Instead, she offered a vague excuse.
"I was simply taking a walk and found myself here."
At her words, Yurien de Harden Kirie smiled faintly. So he was capable of smiling. She had never known. The expressions she had witnessed from him were emotionless, pitying, serene, or—as in that final moment—utterly indescribable. Echinacea stared at that smile, mesmerized. His face was even more beautiful when he smiled. He answered in a tone far softer than his usual clipped manner.
"I had the same reason as you."
"You came for a walk?"
"...Yes."
It seemed far too coincidental. A walk, of all things, to this very place—where her former self had died, on the night he had designated her as his Squire. Could it truly be mere coincidence? Could his memory loss be genuine? There was no way to verify, and reckless probing would be far too dangerous. Echinacea looked up at him quietly and spoke.
"I heard that you designated me as your Squire."
A Squire. One who follows a Knight Instructor. A companion to a Knight Instructor. One who stands at a Knight Instructor's side, offering support in battle and guarding that flank even at the frontmost line. A direct apprentice who receives knowledge and technique from the Knight Instructor. After the probationary period, upon becoming a formal Squire, she would accompany him on all his duties. She would be entrusted with his rest and his back. It was not a responsibility to be given lightly—certainly not to one who had killed him. Then his memory loss must be genuine. Unless he had some other purpose in designating her. Could there be some hidden intention?
"Why did you designate me as your Squire?"
"You...."
Yurien de Harden Kirie halted mid-sentence. Or rather, he swallowed the words. His smile vanished, and a profound, distant gaze fell upon her. After a long silence, he spoke.
"Echinacea Loaz. Would you consent to a sparring match?"
"A sparring match?"
"I wanted to cross swords with you."
A duel, out of nowhere. Moreover, his tone was cautious and imploring—as if he were making a request rather than issuing a command. He could have ordered me outright, but given the reality of our positions—the exalted Knight Order Commander and a mere freshman cadet—it was only natural that I should be the one desperately begging him for a single bout.
"I... I..."
I found myself instinctively stepping back. I had no desire whatsoever to cross swords with him. Yurien de Harden Kirie was, by my knowledge, the strongest knight and the most exceptional Giosa Owner I knew. I had no confidence that I could face him without revealing my true capabilities. Yet it was equally difficult to refuse outright when the situation called for nothing less than jubilation.
"Not now, if you prefer. Whenever you feel ready."
As my confusion deepened, he added calmly. With that, he lowered his hood. His silver hair, loosely bound, cascaded down, and his face was laid bare beneath the streetlight. Bathed in its gentle glow, he appeared as though crowned with a halo.
"Why I chose you as my squire... I'll answer that after we cross swords."
He approached and draped his cloak over my shoulders. My dress was thin, meant for spring outings, with a design that bared my shoulders. Now a deep teal hooded cloak settled upon them. He gently fastened the cloak's ties.
"The night grows cool, so keep your walk brief, Cadet Echinacea."
His hand, which had secured the cloak's fastening, slowly withdrew. Yurien de Harden Kirie turned and walked away, his striking silver hair fully exposed. Those who recognized the Knight Order Commander quickly stepped aside and bowed. He acknowledged their greeting with a slight nod before disappearing into the distance. I remained motionless until he was no longer visible. [What is that bastard thinking? That Langios child certainly chose a strange master.] It was only the Demonic Sword's murmuring that brought me back to my senses. I gripped the cloak draped across my shoulders. My fingertips trembled. Did he know of my erased past? Why did he remember me from that birthday celebration? What was his reason for designating me as his squire? Why did he ask me to cross swords? What was he thinking now? I could understand none of it. In this moment, there was only one thing I could comprehend. The warmth of the cloak enveloping my shoulders. That unexpected, unanticipated warmth flowed down from my shoulders and spread through my chest. Yet like everything else, its meaning remained incomprehensible to me. * * * That night, Echinacea Loaz did not suffer nightmares. Instead, I had a strange dream. In the dream, I was in the underground dungeon of Agenka Castle. A familiar landscape. The very prison where I had been confined. Shackles bound my limbs, yet I did not struggle. My body was my own, not the Demonic Sword's. Blinding light seeped through the gaps of the doubly sealed iron door. As I gazed blankly at that light, I heard footsteps beyond the door. He was coming. Somehow, I immediately knew it was Yurien de Harden Kirie. I rose from where I sat. The moment I lifted myself, the shackles binding my wrists and ankles crumbled away. My limbs felt light. My unsteady gait quickened as I approached the iron door. I opened the door. A silver-haired man stood silhouetted against the light, gazing down at me. The backlighting obscured his face. I looked up at him and smiled broadly. With a radiant smile spreading across my face, I spoke to him. Thank you for waiting for me. There the dream ended. Echinacea Loaz opened my eyes silently. Even after waking, I stared at the ceiling for a long time. It was not a nightmare, but a bittersweet dream. I exhaled a long sigh and rose. On days without classes, the Military Academy allowed complete autonomy except for temporary squire duties. There was no need to wake early. Yet my roommate, Alice, was already awake. Alice had showered; her body still damp, she wore a thin shirt and trousers. When she spotted me sitting on the bed, her expression hardened. Last night when I returned, Alice had been in the room. She had seen me wearing what was unmistakably a man's large cloak. My roommate had left school late on the first night of enrollment and returned wearing a man's cloak. Alice had barely restrained herself from blurting out something about a duel. The same was true now. Alice's gaze traveled from my lace-trimmed pajamas to my hands. On those hands were white gloves. Not knight's gloves or training gloves, but thin women's gloves. Wearing gloves even to sleep.
"..."
Alice's face suggested she had much to say, but she pressed her lips together and turned away. Then something caught her foot; she paused and bent down to pick it up. Her brow furrowed.
"I promised not to pry, but this..."
Alice tossed it onto my bed. It was my appointment letter. I had unfolded it yesterday and apparently left it scattered about and forgotten. She wiped the moisture dripping below her chin with the back of her hand and spoke sharply.
"Did you spread it out like that to show off? I already know well enough that you've become the Commander's squire."
Alice didn't wait for my response. She grabbed her cadet jacket and sword, then left the room. I thought she might slam the door loudly in her irritation, but surprisingly, she didn't.
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