Chapter 124
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125.
Countless gazes pierced down upon Rebecca.
'I wish I could have arrived looking more presentable.'
Rebecca caught sight of her reflection in the vanity mirror, and her mood turned complicated.
Her hair was thoroughly disheveled, and her face was drenched in sweat—an absolute mess.
Rebecca hastily swept her hair back. Then she spoke with perfect composure, as though nothing had happened.
"I believe I've fulfilled the bare minimum of my obligations, so I shall take my leave now. I have no wish to meddle further in another family's affairs."
"Wait, at least have some tea—"
Grace seized Rebecca's sleeve urgently.
Rebecca looked down at Grace's hands, which gripped her skirt tightly.
She frowned for a moment, then lifted her gaze to meet Grace's eyes.
Her look was sharp and questioning, as though asking if Grace had lost her mind.
"Ahhh!"
Alicia let out a scream. Judging by the increasingly shorter intervals between her cries, labor appeared imminent.
At Alicia's scream, Rebecca's eyes widened further.
Grace faltered beneath Rebecca's piercing gaze and reluctantly released her grip.
"Then at least allow me to see you out."
"That won't be necessary. Since when were we ever on such intimate terms? Don't concern yourself with me—just attend to your duties properly."
With those words, Rebecca opened the door and departed with unhurried grace.
The maids stared blankly at the empty space where Rebecca had stood.
They found her transformation utterly unbelievable.
The Rebecca they remembered was like an autumn lakeside—serene yet somehow melancholic.
But today, Rebecca had swept in like rough waves. She had expressed her anger with passion and spoken to Grace with such coldness.
Her expression was frigid, yet she no longer appeared as solitary as before.
'The rumors must be true—the Duke of Johannes truly treats her well.'
Though her appearance was somewhat disheveled, everything Rebecca wore held considerable value.
Now that they thought about it, Rebecca had been a generous mistress.
She never struck them, nor did she hurl insults like Alicia did.
She was quite generous with jewelry and ornaments.
Of course, if Zeppelin caught them, they had to return everything without question.
The Duke of Johannes didn't seem to be such a strict master, so the extra income might have been quite substantial.
Suddenly, they envied Kanna, who had followed Rebecca. Had they known, they would have stayed closer to Rebecca.
As the maids smacked their lips in regret, Grace's thunderous command fell upon them.
"What are you all standing around gawking for? Don't you see the Mistress is suffering?"
At Grace's shout, the maids finally turned their attention to Alicia, who was crying out in pain.
Grace swung her hand as though she might strike a maid at any moment.
'She was the one who grabbed her to have tea, and now this.'
Several maids puckered their lips and began attending to their tasks.
"Ugh... it hurts... it hurts so much..."
Alicia writhed at her waist as the contractions intensified.
She gripped the bedcover so tightly that the fabric tore beneath her fingers. Tears streamed down her pale cheeks.
I knew childbirth was painful, but I never imagined it would be this excruciating.
How much better it would have been if Zeppelin had held my hand, or if even Grace had spoken a word to comfort me.
In this moment, the pain of solitude cut deeper than the relentless waves of agony that crashed over me.
* * *
Stepping out of that suffocating room, familiar surroundings came into view.
The Devon Mansion remained unchanged. Every grain of wood in its pillars seemed saturated with painful memories.
With each step, the sharp sting of a past I wished to forget pierced through me.
Rebecca drew a deep breath and walked slowly down the corridor.
She caught sight of the room that had once been hers, directly across from Alicia's chamber.
It was the second-largest room after Zeppelin's bedroom. It was surprising that Alicia hadn't moved into it.
As the golden doorknob drew closer, Rebecca's breathing grew ragged.
I tried to calm myself, but confronting the past that had tormented me for so long was not easy.
Rebecca shuddered and hurried down the stairs without even glancing at the door.
Then voices arguing erupted from the floor below.
They belonged to Octavio and Zeppelin.
The sounds grew closer, suggesting they were heading this way.
Rebecca quickly climbed back up the stairs and turned the golden doorknob.
Just as she closed the door, she heard the raised voices of two men outside it.
Rebecca held her breath and eavesdropped on the conversation between Octavio and Zeppelin.
"So you intend to continue frequenting the casino?"
"Didn't you tell me to live as I pleased? Now you're trying to restrain me—it's ridiculous."
"That was only when it caused no harm to the family. His Majesty has issued a decree against extravagance! Gambling at a time like this?"
"Haven't you heard that the Marquis of Lancaster is throwing a grand party? The Emperor's decree is merely a simple tactic to quell this situation. There's no need to follow it."
"Your position differs from that of the Marquis of Lancaster, does it not? The Devonshire Family has long been at His Majesty's side. Even the previous Count—"
"Enough. Enough! My head is already splitting from Alicia's screams. Don't add to the noise."
"My lord, your wife is giving birth to your son at this very moment. Yet you speak as though it concerns someone else. Lately, you've been cold toward her, and your treatment of the servants has changed considerably. Moreover, you've even taken measures to keep me from knowing your whereabouts. Has your memory perhaps returned?"
"I am the Count. The master of this Devonshire. If I wish to do something, I do it. I need no one's permission. But looking at your attitude, one might forget who the master truly is. And why is it strange that my affection for Alicia has cooled? Love between a man and woman can fade, can it not?"
"Still, this is too much."
Zeppelin paused before speaking, his tone as though he were testing Octavio.
"I've noticed something odd. Every time I see Alicia, you don't seem to overflow with the affection you claim. Sometimes it's almost repulsive. The only evidence that she is my lover comes from the testimony of those around us. But what if that were a lie? Are you deceiving me?"
"I have never told you a single falsehood, my lord."
"Yes, I'm sure you haven't. After all, you've never stated anything with certainty."
"What do you mean?"
"Nothing in particular."
The atmosphere had grown quite tense.
This was the first time I had seen Octavio and Zeppelin raise their voices at each other like this.
It seemed certain that a rift was forming between them.
Rebecca smiled with satisfaction, pleased that her suspicions had proven correct.
She pressed her ear against the door to glean more information.
"Ahhhhh! Zeppelin!"
But Alicia's scream that followed cut their conversation short.
"It seems you should go to her."
"Most women go through this—Alicia's just being dramatic."
"It's not drama; she's genuinely in pain. And as a first birth, it will be all the more difficult. Would you say the same if Rebecca were the one giving birth?"
Rebecca held her breath. She could almost hear Zeppelin flinch at the mention of my name.
Would he confess that he'd recovered his memories?
If he did, their relationship might return to what it once was.
But mercifully, what came next was Zeppelin's oblivious voice.
"Rebecca? That vicious ex-wife of mine? Why would her name come up when I've already remarried?"
"...No, I misspoke. Now, truly, you should go. The midwife appears to have arrived."
The sound of their footsteps faded into the distance. Rebecca exhaled in relief, leaning against the door.
Their relationship was rotting from within.
Zeppelin was clearly feigning amnesia while continuing to probe Octavio.
Thankfully, he seemed unaware that doing so was like flaying his own flesh.
I lifted my head with a victorious smile.
The room's landscape came into view at once.
"It's unchanged."
The room was exactly as I had left it, as if waiting for its mistress to return.
The wardrobes and display cabinets stood empty, but the rest of the furniture remained.
Though I had once commanded these objects like extensions of myself, I felt oddly estranged from them now.
Despite not having left this place long ago, it felt strange—as though I were stepping into someone else's home.
I found my own transformation curious, gazing absently at the dust motes drifting through the air.
'This is no longer my home.'
Whenever I heard the word 'home,' my heart would constrict.
To me, 'home' had always been a suffocating place—a prison, somewhere I needed to escape.
But now, 'home' was a sanctuary.
Where Julian, Kanna, and Lily were. A place where people who loved me existed.
Having a place to let my guard down was a formidable strength.
Because of it, even when agonizing memories assailed me, I could stand firmly on my own two feet here.
As I surveyed the room, I absently ran my hand along the windowsill.
It was here that I had placed the rapeseed flower vase—where everything began.
The vibrant spring, once as radiant as those rapeseed flowers, had faded, and now the season turned toward winter.
But this winter would be warmer than any before.
I would burn what I had cut down and destroyed this autumn as kindling for the winter's flame.
When I lifted the finger that had traced the windowsill, not a speck of dust clung to it.
Though no one lived here, the place was maintained with perfect care.
"Still waiting for me to return, are you?"
It was absurd. With my initials engraved on every piece of furniture, they should have been discarded long ago.
"Alicia and Octavio were surprisingly willing to permit it."
She collapsed onto the bed.
Suddenly, the memory of Julian's visit to this place surfaced in her mind.
It was the most precious memory from all that had transpired at the Count's Mansion.
His eyes gleaming like amber and the moonlight cascading over his hair.
Remembering Julian's face flushed all the way to his ears, Rebecca let out a soft laugh.
She suddenly longed to see him.
Recently, Julian had been extraordinarily busy.
He was overwhelmed with handling the reports he received, and the Emperor summoned him relentlessly.
It seemed as though the Emperor was flaunting that the Duke of Johannes had become his ally.
Yet no matter how grueling his schedule became, he always took breakfast with Rebecca.
Because of this, Croa would peer at her watch every morning and smoke away her frustration.
But today, for some reason, Julian was already gone when she awoke.
What greeted Rebecca was not Julian's gentle voice, but only the pancakes he had baked with his own hands.
Rebecca discovered her own disappointment and laughed desolately at herself.
'Why am I like this?'
The Countess Who Fled Has Returned
E-book Publication
January 12, 2022
Author
Long night sky
Publisher
Desert fox
Published by
Woongjin ThinkBig Co., Ltd.
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Blog
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@wjt_fennecfox
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Brought to you by Valir Scans! To support our team and enjoy the latest releases, please read directly on our official site: valirscans.org
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